Counseling Blog

February 2025

Understanding Stress and Anxiety: Supporting Your Family’s Mental Health

Proverbs 3:5-6: Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.

As a school counselor at Dunham, I often see students and families navigating the complex emotions of stress and anxiety. Both stress and anxiety are normal reactions to life’s challenges, but when they become overwhelming, they can have serious effects on mental, physical, and spiritual health. It’s important for families to understand the difference between the two, why addressing them is essential, and how to manage them in healthy ways to improve overall well-being and strengthen relationships. We know the core reason for most stressful and anxious situations is fear. The Bible talks hundreds of times about fear; so we know it is an important topic to address in our lives.

Stress vs. Anxiety: What’s the Difference?

Too often we misuse these terms for how we feel and what we are going through. I believe it is helpful to be able to differentiate between the two, so we know what they are and how to appropriately deal with them. 

Stress is a natural response to a real or perceived challenge or demand. It’s usually tied to external pressures—such as a big test, moving to a new home, or relationship difficulties—that trigger a "fight or flight" response. This triggered brain response makes us feel like we are in danger. Stress can be helpful in some situations, as it can motivate us to perform well and meet deadlines. However, chronic stress, if not managed, can lead to burnout and physical health problems.

Anxiety, on the other hand, is more internal and often arises without an immediate external trigger. It’s a feeling of unease or worry about something that might happen in the future. I’ve always liked to say that it is a constant feeling of “bracing for impact.” Of what, we are unsure – but we know it’ll be bad. Anxiety can be excessive and persistent, even when there’s no clear cause. It’s important to recognize when anxiety becomes overwhelming, as it can interfere with daily life and relationships.

Why It’s Important to Address Stress and Anxiety

Stress and anxiety can take a toll on every aspect of a person’s life. When not addressed, they can lead to:

• Mental health decline: Prolonged stress and anxiety can increase the risk of depression, burnout, and other mental health challenges.
• Physical health issues: Chronic stress can cause problems like headaches, sleep disturbances, digestive issues, and weakened immune function.
• Spiritual distress: When stress and anxiety are not managed, they can diminish one’s sense of peace, purpose, and connection with themselves and others.

The Impact on Relationships

Stress and anxiety can have a significant negative effect on relationships. When someone is stressed or anxious, they may become irritable, withdrawn, or overly reactive. This can cause tension within families, between parents and children, and even affect friendships. When emotions are overwhelming, communication often suffers, and misunderstandings increase.

For families, this can mean less quality time together, more arguments, and decreased emotional support. The ripple effect of unaddressed stress and anxiety can create a cycle of negativity that is hard to break.

How Stress and Anxiety Affect Family Systems

In a family system, when one member is struggling with stress or anxiety, it can affect the entire household. Children may pick up on their parents’ stress, leading to emotional distress or behavioral problems. Parents may feel disconnected from each other, as stress can make it hard to nurture their relationship. When stress and anxiety go unchecked, the overall family dynamic may become strained.

It’s important to address stress and anxiety early to protect family health. When parents model healthy coping strategies, children learn how to manage their own stress and anxiety effectively, creating a supportive and resilient family environment.

Healthy Ways to Deal with Stress and Anxiety

1 Peter 5:6-7: Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.

Fortunately, there are many healthy strategies for managing stress and anxiety:

1. Lean on our faith: As Christians, we can rely heavily on prayer, reading the Bible, spiritual counsel, worship, and our faith communities to ease our stress and anxiety. Sometimes, those practices can take our symptoms away completely or help put them into perspective, allowing us to see past them or see them in a different light. This can bring relief to our symptoms, context to our problems, and hope in our situation. Key Bible verses that address fear: Phil. 4:6, 2 Tim. 1:7, and Joshua 1:19.
2. Practice mindfulness and relaxation: Simple techniques like deep breathing, meditation, and yoga can help calm the mind and body. Encourage your family to take time each day to slow down and focus on the present moment.
3. Exercise regularly: Physical activity reduces stress hormones and boosts mood-enhancing chemicals in the brain. Exercise can be a fun family activity, like going for walks or playing sports together.
4. Maintain a healthy routine: Consistent sleep, nutritious meals, and time for relaxation help keep stress levels manageable. Encourage your children to stick to a routine that includes time for both schoolwork and play.
5. Foster open communication: Encourage family members to talk about their feelings, especially when stress or anxiety is building up. Creating a safe space for honest conversations can help everyone feel heard and supported.
6. Limit screen time: Constant exposure to social media and news can increase anxiety. Set boundaries around screen time and encourage activities that promote connection and relaxation.

Mental Health Resources

Sometimes, stress and anxiety can feel overwhelming and difficult to manage alone. There’s no shame in seeking help. Here are some resources that can support families in navigating stress and anxiety:

• School counselors: Reach out to your child’s school counselor for strategies to support their mental health.
• Therapists and counselors: A mental health professional can provide tailored coping strategies and support for individual or family therapy.
• Hotlines: In times of crisis, calling a mental health hotline can provide immediate support and resources. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (1-800-273-TALK) and the Anxiety and Depression Association of America (ADAA) are valuable resources.
• Mindfulness apps: Apps like Calm, Headspace, and Insight Timer offer guided meditation and stress-reducing exercises for both adults and children.

Conclusion

Stress and anxiety are part of the human experience, but when they are left unchecked, they can affect our health, relationships, and overall well-being. By understanding the difference between stress and anxiety, learning how to manage them effectively, and utilizing mental health resources, families can create a supportive environment that promotes resilience and healthy coping. As a Dunham family, let's work together to nurture both individual and family mental health so that everyone can thrive.